The beginning of the goodbyes

I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I want to see.
John Burroughs

My dear friend Holly Sutter and I were able to escape for a few hours Saturday morning and share our time at the farmer’s market in Columbia City.  I have fond memories of  mornings at the market with Holly from last year and I wanted to make sure I got at least one market visit in with her before we leave…although, if she’s free in the morning this weekend I still haven’t been to the South Side Market and I do need bacon…but that’s a completely different topic and I’m going to do my best to stay focused. 

When Holly brought me home she stopped in to see the Mark Twain.  I told her how Andrew, Aydan, the pups and I like to hang out in there and simply chill with each other.  Holly said that our trips in and out of the Mark Twain were our way of filling it with our energy.  I hadn't really thought about it that way but she is completely right!  I can already feel that energy each time I’m in there.  I love hanging out in the Mark Twain.  The scent of the camper has a nostalgia quality of childhood for me conjuring up images of trips with my family, camp fires, bathing suits, wet clothes and absolute exhaustion at night so that falling asleep was a breeze .  The energy building up in that camper is love, gratitude, and LOVE!  I feel as though I may focus on love a lot…but for Andrew, Aydan and me, that’s what our lives are based on.  And that is why, even though it is totally the right thing to do, it is going to be so, so, so hard to say good bye. 

I had mentioned before how the plan is to spend as much time as possible with friends at this time as possible and that seemed to be the focus of the weekend.  Sunday night we had our mock camp out night.  We gathered up grills and foods from our friends and hung out in our driveway with the Mark Twain offering a comfortable gathering space for a surprising number of people (I think at one point there were 8 adults and one toddler).  That camper is the bomb.  I am so glad we were impulsive and bought the first one we looked at because it is absolutely perfect for our needs.  Andrew and I set up the awning and I brought out condiments and cheeses and put them in our little fridge in the camper while Andrew and Aydan worked on getting the grill ready for burgers and brats.  It was a great little gathering with people that we love and will miss so much! 

Lighting of the grill!  Me inside on Andrew's and my bed.  

Now this is a good picture of some good looking people.  Jordan, Zdenka, and Jeziah hanging out, being pretty :) 

Sadly, I did not get an in-focus picture of sweet little Luna, Jordan and Zdenka's daughter, but she is a little blur of motion at this time so this seems appropriate to share.  

I feel as though I should have taken so many more pictures!  But, like I said, our whole weekend was pretty great so...here are a few more weekend pictures and stories! 

This is my first attempt at Kale chips.  Yum! My former boss and current friend, Mike, at Old Crown mentioned that he had more organic kale than he could use I mentioned my recently found love of kale and came home with four bunches.  I chopped up and rinsed the kale, used about a tablespoon of coconut oil and some sea salt and pepper, baked them and then ate the heck out of them. Easy and delicious! My someday garden will definitely have kale.   

Friday night roof party hosted by lovely Audra.  It was her first time hosting for the dinner party group and I must say, excellent job old girl! :)  The view was spectacular and the company, as always, exceptional.  By the way, the tall white building to the left is where I was working for the past year...and, now that I think about it, I worked in the other really tall building as well.  Downtown Fort Wayne isn't much but it is so quaint and endearing.  Sigh.  Oh Fort Wayne, I will miss your crazy one way streets, your charming local restaurants, and your all around good humor. I never expected to fall in love with this city but I very much did...another good bye that will be harder than expected. 

Rooftop party AND fireworks?  Heck yes :) 

 I finally figured out how to pack mom's urn!  Hooray! The packaging was actually what my last shipment of meds came wrapped in. My shots have to stay cold so they insulate and pack them carefully and then I don't have to worry about the quality of my medications.  Nice, right? When I went to lift her urn off the window sill in the green room, I realized that it had been a long time since I checked in with mom.  Weird, I know, she's been dead for nearly seven years, and I think about her so often, but I hadn't really "talked" to her in quite some time.  So, while I was removing the dust from her urn and oh so carefully wrapping bubble tape around her, I told her about the wedding, about our move, about Aydan's first year of middle school, just everything I could think of.  I smiled and cried and knew that she would definitely have spoken her mind about some of the less conservative decisions I have made but I also knew that she would be proud of her daughter and happy that I have found so much happiness in my life.  I guess you could say I spent the afternoon with my mom...and it was so good for me.

This is pretty much all of my clothes and most of my bathroom stuff.  Eager to leave? No way!  Andrew's and Aydan's packs should be coming in today and I'm going to do the same thing with their clothes.  Might as well get used to it, right?

Droopy from the rain but one of the things I will miss the most about our house is the peonies that bloom every year.  I plan on having a bouquet of them on the window sill in the kitchen from now until we leave...

Sorting through some of my memory items, I put this together for my bestie, Megan.  A collage of the cards, notes, and coloring book pages she has given to me over the last year and a half.  I love that girl. 

And the chalk board door count down continues!  Gasp!  Just 10 days to go! 

We are starting our goodbyes now and I know I am trying not to think of them that way.  My grandmother used to always tell us that it was never "goodbye" but always "I will see you later", she said it in German but I'm not sure how to spell it...the message is the same even if it doesn't sound as cool.  I don't plan on easily letting go of any of my dear friends here even if we are saying good bye...for now.